Break dangers.

The danger of taking a break for too long leads to fatigue, lethargy, tiredness, and laziness, which gradually deteriorates an idle mind—a true tragedy. To me, an idle mind means handing over control of my life to others, allowing them to dictate how I live. When I think about it, I realize I was living dangerously by observing their seemingly good yet subtly vicious motives. Their irritation toward me was a reflection of their own experiences because I was unknowingly mirroring their behaviors and attitudes.

I became a mirror reflecting their own selves, which led to their dislike because they saw in me what they didn’t like about themselves. I was imitating them so precisely that their experiences profoundly affected me. I copied everything they did, discarding only what I perceived as negative. As I continued to mimic them, people in my work circles began to avoid me.

My mind was often blank when it came to making decisions, and I found myself making quick, impulsive choices based on the copied experiences I had gathered from others, without considering the consequences. My mind would go blank, shrouded in darkness, leaving me unable to think on my feet. This inability to think quickly was my own fault for not trusting myself enough to come up with sharp, brilliant answers to counter challenges.

This blankness was the chaotic result of internalizing other people’s experiences, continuously updating myself to engage in conversations based on their preferences. I passively waited for people to approach me with their complaints, sicknesses, and sad stories. It’s a wonder how this cycle continued.