No noisy

What could you do more of?

I want no more phone beeps, no more crickets creaking, and no more menacing entities in my life. I need peaceful, quiet zero noise. I’ve been ignoring those phone notifications since 2003, but the beeping has followed me for years.  I began Devi sadhana yesterday and have been trying to understand why this keeps happening. It feels so strange.

After practicing Devi sadhana for the fourth time, I discovered the noises were coming from Xandra’s side — whether she knew it or not, it was her. Why must she follow me? Why has this radar-like beeping been trailing me all this time?I also realized that I had been thinking of her in a negative way and that was why all these strange incidents were happening to me in an evil negative way. I realized I should never think of her and need not have any relationship with her ever again. Even though this hypocritical Xandra has followed me for years and has performed many exorcisms, she still won’t leave me alone. Her misery is her own hell doing. Why can’t she just stop?

Today another thing happened. I stopped at a crossroads, waiting at the red light inside with passengers, listening to Hanuman hymns to steady myself. Cars were moving from my left, and I watched them cross. Then the traffic light turned green — but I stayed stopped. I couldn’t move because I felt the stream of motorcycles, cars and a small lorry still crossing in front of me. This is my responsibility to take care of myself, the car and the safety of the passengers inside. The moment felt like déjà vu, heavy and familiar. I knew immediately who was behind it: Xandra. All this time, it’s been her. Why is she still doing this? Why won’t she let me have even an ordinary moment of calm?