What relationships have a positive impact on you?
The mind is restless, turbulent, strong, and obstinate.”
Bhagavad Gita 6.34
This is a positive reflection about myself.
In the past, when intense inner perceptions arose experiences that felt like telepathic communication I learned to observe them calmly. At first, I would listen. But when the questions began shooting rapidly, like rockets, I chose not to engage. Instead, I started singing my mantras. I did this sincerely to ground myself and protect my focus, because I did not want to place myself at risk, especially of distraction or accidents. At times, I chose to release these experiences by sending love and peaceful energy, allowing them to dissolve and return to stillness.
Recently, I read a quote by Sadhguru that made me pause. It felt strange and yet deeply true.
Another experience happened early one morning at 4:30 a.m. while I was following the Margazhi sadhana online. During meditation, I felt my awareness being pulled inward very strongly, almost as if I were drifting into another inner space. I was momentarily shocked and kept asking myself how to leave that state. Then I felt another pull from within myself, drawing me even deeper inward.
I lost myself briefly in the moment. Tears flowed naturally, as though a long-held emotional burden was releasing. In my inner vision, I perceived two people, as if sitting on a bed and staring into empty space, until the third person called them away. I then sensed my deeper inner self becoming light like a millions of small butterfly and gently disappearing from that space.
At that point, I reminded myself clearly and firmly: I am here. I am sitting on my yoga mat, with a cushion beneath me, meditating safely.
After completing the practice, I lay down again to rest. Sensory impressions arose, such as the smell of brewed hot coffee, but I consciously grounded myself. I told myself that I was only drinking water and needed to sleep a little longer. Later, I realized I had spent much of the morning unsettled instead of conserving energy to leave for work on time.
That night, a similar sensation arose again this time, the smell of mango leaves, as if being brushed against me. Before lighting the lamp, I consciously sought refuge in my deity and continued with the evening prayers. I realized something important: earlier, I had relied on reaction and fear, but now I was choosing devotion.
As I continued the night sadhana, my mind became steady. In my inner awareness, I sensed that devotion itself created a boundary nothing needed to be resisted, nothing needed to be fought. I understood that before this, I had been afraid to think, because every thought seemed to rebound instantly, like instant karma. Through devotion, I am learning to stabilize my mind and trust myself again.
I am changing. I am choosing to follow myself through devotion with awareness instead of fear, grounding instead of imagination, and discipline instead of confusion.
The relationships that have the most positive impact on me are not only external. They are the relationships I cultivate with my practice, my mantra, my deity, and my inner clarity. These relationships protect me, steady me, and bring me back to myself.
“Through constant practice and detachment, the mind is brought under control.”
Bhagavad Gita 6.35
JumpSoftware 
Leave a comment